Life in Libya II: Adopt, Adapt, Adjust

Dealing with Culture Shock
pinkytabor (408) ranked 1,150 out of 28,103 in people
4 months ago
In one way or another some of us have been shocked, amused, amazed or even upset by and at how those with different culture do things or live. But eventually we have either adjusted and even adapted some of their ways. I am from the Philippines and my foreigner husband could site too many things that Filipinos do that both shock and amuse him. Then, we moved to his country six months ago and i wa smore shocked than he was when he's in my country. I could not believe how people manage their time here. I wonder how women could afford to sit and talk over tea for hours without worrying at least about something else to do such as house chores, the kids, etc. It seems like "anything goes" for them when it comes to schedule. They usually have breakfast at 10 or 11am, luch at 3 or 4pm, then dinner at 10 or 11pm. By the time dinner comes, i am already very tired and sleepy. Eventually, i have adjusted and realized that these are their way of enjoyment. Women here love to talk and spend time together. It's their way of relieving stress for they have to do everything at home, and most of them having at least 3 small kids. I have also adapted to their "time", learned to sleep at 1 am. The hard thing for me is i tend to lack sleep because i always wake up at 6 or 7am. Waking up late like 9 or 10am is one thing yet i have to learn here.:) I would love to hear amusing and inspiring stories like this. Please share yours.

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Do you also wonder how some do it?
pinkytabor (408) ranked 93 out of 3,064 in wife
3 months ago
My sister in law lives across us, a door infront our unit. She is an amazingly beautiful woman with two boys age same as mine. I always wonder how she always seem to look fresh, and her house looks so clean and she is always calm despite the riots of her boys in her house. By mid day, i already looked so harrassed, after cleaning the house, doing the laundry and bathing my boys. While she, whenever i bring my two year old to her house to play with her son, has make up on, like she's always looking ready to go out, and her house looks so immaculately clean, and i could smell the cake she's baking. She seem to handle it so well, or maybe because she has nothing else to do but look good, and clean. MAybe she seldom cooks meals and feed her sons, maybe she doesn't really clean the house, it just looks clean. Maybe she doesn't wash herself, just put on perfume and make-up...and maybe she really isn't bothered by her sons climbing on the tv and breaking glasses. Maybe she doesn't worry that her son might fall off the stairs playing when she let him go out while she sits and relax infront of the TV. Maybe schedules is not her thing, because they sleep anytime and eat anytime whenever they feel like. DO you also wonder, like me, how some women - housewives, seem to look so unharassed by the demanding and overwhelming tasks of household management? How do you think they manage it and still look so great and unbothered by anything?

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What could be better for a married person than this
pinkytabor (408) ranked 472 out of 29,285 in life
4 months ago
Amazing in-laws. What i have learned from foreigners married to nationals of this country is that 90 percent of divorce is caused by troubles with the in-laws. That includes marriage of both locals. This is a country wherein family ties and "voice" of parents are highly valued. Even some marriages here are still prearranged. I guess even in other countries, and most marriages, troubles with in laws cannot be avoided. And i guess, most problems come from the meddling of a mother-in-law on a couple's life - spoiling the children, coming to the house unannounced and trying to do things her way in housekeeping, etc. My mother raised me up, setting a very good example in respecting and loving the family of her husband. In turn, my father also loved my mother's parents, letting them live with is until both passed away. Now that i am married, i feel so blessed with a wonderful mother in-law, a good natured father in law, super sweet sisters in-law and great brothers in-law. I guess my parents planted a seed on this which now i am enjoying. It's really very rare nowadays to have good, if not great, relationship with in-laws. Good means, open, honest (without any hypocrisy) and loving relationship. My mother in law never fails to come up to our house in the third floor, everyday, bringing me lunch for the past six months already. I know that she is not perfect, just like me, but she is so real. And so are the rest of my husband's family. I am happy to be blessed. This is not luck. This has been secretly wished by my parents when i was born. And i pray for the same to my sons.

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